And the winner is...Warren Beatty?

Welcome to the 64th annual Warren Beatty Awards Show!



Wait, you mean it wasn't all about him? With his tribute and acceptance speech taking up what seemed like all of the ten o'clock hour, I had forgotten that there were hundreds of other actors in the audience!

I have some rants and raves after watching the Golden Globes, and I must get this one off of my chest first:

The winner of the Golden Globe for Hollywood's most pretentious couple iiiiiis...Warren Beatty and Annette Bening! You're so vain, I bet you think this wholedamnawardsshow is about you, don't you, don't you? Thank you for keeping my gag reflex in check year after year. I wonder if Annette put down her glass of champagne long enough to clap for her husband's tribute?

I would take Clint E. and Dustin H. (ow ow) to Warren any ol' day.

Speaking of the hot, AARP-aged men, why did Jack Nicholson sport shades during the entire show?... Nevermind, I don't need to know. He pulls it off. While he may have as many liver spots as I do freckles, he's still devastatingly charming. I really enjoy looking at him and would love to be on the list of those-that-could-be-his-granddaughter-and-still-slept-with-him. Or I'd least like to be his daughter - the one on stage handing out the Globes.


"You do not know how much this does for my confidence!" Jennifer Hudson started off the show on a great note. It's so nice to see a Hollywood actor who is still humble and sincerely grateful to be there (cough, Emily Blunt, cough cough). I didn't hear her thank Simon Cowell though...oh wait, that's cause he was a jerk. (Note: another season of AI begins tonight!)

Emily Blunt's acceptance speech was more like a "Well, duh, of course I won this award" speech. I can hardly believe she was nominated for the DWP but cannot further comment since I haven't seen her other work. Newsflash: how did I miss the fact that she's courting my fave male crooner, Michael Bublé?
Prince! Best to use your Little Red Corvette next time to ensure that "heavy traffic" is never again an issue in accepting a G.G. win.

Helen Mirren, aka Queen of the Globes, is a class act. Such a graceful lady and I even prefer her to the real Queen of England. She's dazzling, aging well, and pulls off "icy" nearly as well as my fave...

Meryl. Streep. She is AMAZING; worthy of all caps, even. Brilliantly witty & stunning and while her dress (style & color) weren't the most flattering, her lovely speech more than made up for it. I did the embarrassing cheer-from-my-living-room bit when her name was announced as the winner.

I remember the first movie I ever saw her in: Death Becomes Her (with Goldie Hawn, who has since dropped off the face of the earth). Though I must have been nine, I knew right then that Ms. Streep was a timeless gem.

I feel awful that Cameron Diaz has missed the memo re: red lipstick being over and done with. The dark hair (of which I am not a fan) seems freshly dyed - perhaps to hide the grey hairs caused by her recent split with JT (whose new movie has gotten rave reviews from my office)? I won't even comment on the mistake that was Cam's dress...

I will, however, comment on this: I am not on the Ugly Betty bandwagon and don't understand how it beat out The Office, or even the Wisteria women. Tyra Banks pretty much killed the "pretty girl dressed as the ugly girl" bit for me and I was seriously counting on this show being cancelled after this season. I do believe America's shrieking (all the way from her table to the stage) made my ears bleed. As for Vanessa and Salma - I can't stand them either, but if forced to look at them on stage, I'm at least grateful that they all wore pretty dresses.

And America's win as Best Actress in a TV show? I admit that she warmed my heart with her happy tears and genuine speech, but don't expect me to join her fan club, especially since she beat out Felicity, who was her normal, understatedly beautiful self. She is aging much better than her hubby, but cheers to them for surviving the marital holocaust that is Hollywood.

Eddie Murphy? I can't look at you the same since you've blatantly denied the baby the Scary Spice is carrying. Maury Povich called: he'll do the paternity test for free.

"People are falling all over themselves to send you free shoes and free cufflinks and colonic irrigations for two. Nobody ever offers you a free acceptance speech. There just seems to be a gap in the market. I would love to be able to pull out a speech by Dolce & Gabbana." Hugh McLaurie = witty! Again! I loved his speech last year but am quite sure he out did himself. Perhaps if he wore that tux on House, I'd be tempted to tune in.

Tom Hanks, who has apparently donated his curls to Will Ferrell, was seen looking older, wiser, and perhaps slightly sexier? I enjoyed his award presentation (even if it was for W.B.) This seems to be the year for the older Hollywood men. Refreshingly enough, Helen and Meryl have made it true for Hollywood women as well.

Reese! Hate the dress, love, love, love the bangs! Yellow screams "I'm happy, really, I am!" and I don't buy it. Would've much rather seen her in pink or blue.

Jennifer Lopez has stepped out of the spotlight long enough for me to appreciate her again. She looked beautiful as she presented, and I quite like her and Marc, mostly because I wouldn't have otherwise paired them together.

And the man who won not only a Golden Globe, but my heart: Sacha Baron Cohen. His sideburns are a bit long, but hardly distracting because his speech was so funny. Visions of naked wrestling sugarplums are still dancing in my head.

Grey's Anatomy analysis (short because they were quickly and rudely ushered off stage before I could get a good look at them all - no doubt due to the show being behind schedule thanks to the hour o' Beatty): Kate Walsh= stunning (and a fine representation of redheads everywhere); Katherine Heigl = you probably didn't win because you wore too much eye make-up and your dress was vampy - perhaps you should've used Denny's 8+ million dollar check to have purchased a nicer gown; Ellen Pompeo= better than usual but sorry, you've been ruined in my eyes since your appearance on Punk'd; Sandra Oh: two thumbs up, you're my fave; McDreamy = McDelicious.

Eric Dane: Uhuhuhuh. Shonda, you are the woman. I was afraid the show would be completely overlooked this year, but whew. Sigh of relief.

Kate Winslet: refreshingly beautiful, per usual (though she has yet to ditch the red lipstick either). Perhaps someone on the set of The Holiday mistakenly told Cam & Kate that red lips are all the rage?

Forest Whitaker's award was a pleasant surprise. His speech began as a train wreck, but he remained charming throughout. I'm sure Leo's shelves can't fit another award anyway (though he did look cute!).

Patricia freakin' Arquette: why is so impossible for you to flatter yourself every once in a while? I couldn't tell which was worse, the hair or the makeup, for I had to look away quickly. (I'm sparing you a pic here...)

Overall opinion of the show: slightly boring. Was hoping for more politically (or otherwise) controversial comments. The only ones came from some Brit with poor delivery who advised us to take to the streets in protest. However, the time flew by and the show held my attention for all three hours and I can hardly wait for the next show...